Dancing With the "Stars"

I woke up this morning to breaking news: The cast for season 11 of "Dancing With the Stars" has been announced!  It includes Jersey Shore's Mike "The Situation", Audrina Patridge from The Hills, Bristol Palin and David Hasselhoff.

Wait, who are the stars?

Somewhere along the way, America has confused people with actual talent with people who fight and pull hair on reality TV.  Jersey Shore is a show about guidos and guidettes from the East Coast who tease their hair, make-out a lot, bring nasty girls home and get into bar fights.  Mike "The Situation" is "famous" for his rock-hard abs and for saying things like, GTL, which stands for Gym, Tan, Laundry (the three things he does daily.)  Sadly I just read that The Situation will take home $5 million this year, and an estimated $10 million next year for his reality shows, clothing line, and appearances.  What are we thinking people??  This guy will make more than doctors and teachers just for working out.  Sheesh.

Luckily Audrina Patridge will be dancing and not talking, because if you ever saw The Hills, you know she can't put two words together.  But putting Bristol Palin on, the single mother who's been engaged twice to a douche bag, is just what America needs!

Maybe David Hasselhoff can start off his dancing by eating a cheeseburger off of the floor.

Wow, well at least Carol Brady, a.k.a. Florence Henderson, has also been cast.  Maybe her squeaky clean image can clean up the rest of the dirt on the show.

Click here to see the entire cast.