It's official!

It's official!
David Stubbs Photography

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Hands-free breast pumps

Since becoming pregnant, I've gotten a LOT of advice on what I absolutely have to have for the baby and/or myself. And I'm not going to lie, some of it is a little scary. At 36 weeks preggo, it's becoming blatantly clear that A) there's no turning back and B) kids need a lot of crap.

One of the recommendations I received is that I should register for a hands-free breast pump--that way I can get work done while squeezing out food for the munchkin. The best part about registering for this device is seeing the amazing photos that come with it. Take a look...

Apparently, the pump comes in super handy at the office. And no ladies, we don't need to hide in the bathrooms anymore. We are women, hear us roar! We can pump at our desks, during meetings or video conferences...basically, wherever and whenever we want.

And if our male boss walks in? We'll just pretend we don't have two big suction cups on our lady bits. As long as we're wearing a cute suit and smiling, it's totally legit.

Think you need to give up drinking while pumping? Heck no! You can do both at once. Pinot anyone?

Worried about missing out on a game of Words with Friends? Never fear! You can candy crush that game all day long with your super portable pump.
And thank god you can finally get those Glamour shots you've been wanting to get. These photos will prove that you can truly do it all as a working mother! (Perhaps next year's Christmas card?)

And finally, well, I'm not really sure what this shows. Perhaps that you can check out the local renaissance festival while pumping? Or take your older kids trick or treating? Or fulfill your husband's role playing fantasy?

P.S. A big thanks to my friend Jackie for buying one of these for me. I'm totally going to pump on the crosstown bus, subway and crowded, tourist-filled restaurants. (And I'm going to wear my old Miss Wyoming crown.) Stay tuned for that blog! 


  1. Now here is a subject to talk about on the Bethenny Show! Give your girl a ring and see if she likes the story line...

  2. wow.......I need a collect my thought's. first, not do that at the office.....or....offer to do it 'live' ....on the morning show. How 'brave' are U...???