Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
I've had more than one tourist ask me what the "Magnificent Mile" is, and I wanted to reply, "Well, it's only magnificent in February when all the tourists like you aren't in town."
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
I always thought women who didn't change their names after getting married were probably hippies at heart who didn't want to give up their identities. Sometimes I even thought they were just taking the easy route, and didn't want to go to the trouble. Or they didn't want to give up a common name like "Smith" for something crazy like "Bushwacker."
Monday, July 26, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
"Whoa oh, here she comes! Watch out boy, she'll chew you up! Whoa oh here she comes, she's a maneater!"
Friday, July 23, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Okay, so I've only been married about 3 weeks, but I've totally just uncovered a man's secret! When asked to do something they really don't want to do, they screw it up so they don't have to do it anymore!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
I'm not just saying this because I was on the verge of becoming an old maid, but I think getting married in your 30's has a lot of advantages over getting married in your 20's. I'll admit, I have a ton of friends who happily got married in their 20's, and now have a few darling kids (some of my friends have 15 year-olds. Yikes!), and they are super happy. But I realize when I went to their weddings, I was the worst wedding guest ever because I had no idea about wedding etiquette and gifts, and I'm sure I wasn't the only one.
Friday, July 16, 2010
When you start planning your wedding, you buy every wedding magazine or how-to book within arm's reach. You just know that Martha Stewart (albeit, single) can give you the right tips for the perfect day.
A couple of months ago, I realized there is a really strange trend when it comes to wedding dresses and accessories: they're ugly. Look at these examples! Seriously?? Yes, Mama Mays sometimes made me wear a swimming cap during my Kentucky summer visits to her pool, but it didn't start my dream towards wearing a jewel-encrusted cap when I got older and married Prince Charming. True, it would have cut down on my getting ready time by hours, but I'm pretty sure I would have felt more ready to do a couple of laps, rather than saying, "I do." And yes, I'm already pale, so you can bet that I'm not going to have white make-up put all over me for an "Asian theme."
True, Wyoming gets a little chilly at night (think 40's,) but imagine the guest's reaction if I walked out with this poofy, whip-cream topping-ish wrap. I guess the question of where I should put my Kleenex would be solved with this monstrosity, because it looks like I could hide small children in there.
And yet, the sad reality is these dresses and accessories probably cost more than anything I own.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
As the new hubby and I were driving back from our honeymoon, we saw every couple's worst nightmare: a flashing sign warning us of construction up ahead with 60 minute delays. 60! Sure, there are plenty of times I've sat in a construction mess for a full hour, but no one ever had the heart to warn me beforehand it would be that long. They usually just tacked up a "10 minute" delay sign and called it good for their conscience.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
No one ever prepares you for the sadness that comes after a wedding. Seriously, I could cry every time I think about it being over. For two years, my life was all about choosing a wedding location, deejay, photographer and flavors of cupcakes. Every week, and sometimes everyday, I would makes decisions that would affect the happiest day of my life. Really, when you think about it, I was planning for the big day for 32 years. Every little girl dreams of her wedding day; if fact, I started pulling the pages of wedding magazines years ago, when I started thinking about what dress I wanted to wear. I always dreamed of walking down the aisle to a devastatingly good-looking man, who surely would be tall, dark and handsome.
I did all that, and it was amazing.... but now it’s over.
Now it’s back to the reality that I’m underemployed, living in a 660-square foot apartment, and have a ton of bills to pay.
Well, it would be if the end prize didn’t mean I have a fabulous man to call my husband. I truly hit the husband jackpot with him. I’m also pursuing a writing career and have one book written and another started. And we may not have the largest apartment, but it’s filled with a lot of love.
To everyone who made July 3, 2010 the most amazing day of my life--I thank you. After waiting my whole life, I thought surely I had created expectations that couldn't be lived up to. I’m happy to report the wedding not only met those expectations, it exceeded them ten-fold.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Okay, I’m officially addicted to Twilight. Mike and I saw Eclipse last night, and I’ve been dreaming of Edward and Jacob ever since (what every woman should be doing on her honeymoon.) Women across this country are screaming “Team Edward!” or “Team Jacob!” as I exclaim “I want them both!”
I didn’t realize just how much this series is geared towards women. As we were giving our tickets to the ticket taker, he turned to Mike and laughed, “Oh, so she dragged you here.” Mike told him he likes Vampire movies, only not ones where the vampires are “sissies.”
Here’s the thing--every women dreams of two men loving her, and being caught in a love triangle-- and that’s exactly what’s happening for Bella. Edward is the good-looking, mysterious vampire. Jacob is the strong and hot Werewolf. I say both have pro’s and con’s...so let’s break down who is the better match.
Edward tells Bella he loves her and wants to marry her. You might think that’s pretty mature for a high school senior, only quite the contrary. He’s like 200 years old, but he never ages, so at 200, he’d better be ready to settle down.
Jacob has the body of a roman god, and likes to show it off by never wearing a shirt. Hot to look at, but c’mon, he totally knows it! He doesn’t even wear a shirt when it’s snowing, which is one-way ticket to pneumonia.
Edward never ages. Cool, except Bella is going to have to get a lot of Botox to keep up with her ageless beau. Eventually, Edward will probably get tired of her, and trade her in for a younger version.
Jacob says things like, “Loving me would be as easy as breathing.” Sweet, but guys who usually talk like that are named Jake Pavelka and are the Bachelor. They also cry at the drop of a hat, and their relationships don’t last.
Edward clearly knows the dangers of the sun, and has pale, silky smooth skin. He won’t have to worry about skin cancer, but he also melts in the sun. Not. Good.
Jacob is willing to fight for the love of Bella, so he instantly turns into a Werewolf to fight off the Vampires. Super sweet, yet he rips all his clothes when he makes the transformation. I’m sure after a few years, Bella will get tired of sewing and mending his jean shorts.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Good afternoon from Jackson, Tennessee! Mike and I decided on a laid-back honeymoon at my parent’s summer home which is in the middle of nowhere. It’s great--there are no telephones, cell service, TV’s, or neighbors. To publish this blog, we have to drive into town and find WI-FI service (and I will have to charge you $9.95 for that effort.)
We drove down last night, which took about 7 hours from Chicago. Considering we’ve taken trips both driving and flying this week, I’ve decided driving is way better. Here are some thoughts about flying I jotted down in Jackson, Wyoming while sitting in the very crowded airport.....
What is it about flying that’s so terrible? Really, it shouldn't’t be that bad considering you’re super excited to go on a family vacation or a wedding, and when it’s over you’re usually super excited about going home and finally using your own bathroom.
Waiting in the security line is just brutal. Why are people so stinkin’ slow? I get that we now have to take off our shoes and belts and just about everything else. Here’s my solution: wear flip flops, no jewelry and go sans belt. I say we should all become accepting of showing some butt crack if it means getting through security faster.
Also, why do people have so many damn bags? Yes, I have 3 bags today, but Mike has 1, so it evens out. But I just got married people, so that excuses my 12 pairs of shoes! What’s your excuse? What the airlines are making in charging people for shipping bags, they have to be losing in delays because everyone now carries on bags the size of The Biggest Loser's sweatpants. To add to the fun, carry-ons are so stuffed and heavy, passengers can’t lift them up into the overhead bin, so we wait twice as long to board.
Seriously parents, do you need to pack so much stuff? I can appreciate that little Johnny loves Toy Story 3 and wants every toy from the movie with him. I can also appreciate that you want him to have his playpen and crib and special travel seat. But does he need it? My mom jokingly tells me my bed when we traveled was a dresser drawer filled with blankets, and I don’t seem too emotionally damaged.
And as I’ve said before, there’s something rank about airport bathrooms. Have you ever noticed they always smell like poo? What is with that?? Have we ever heard of courtesy flushes, people?? Or going before you head to the airport??
P.S. I know this picture posted has nothing to do with this post, but I just love our wedding pics, so get ready to see more!!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Monday, July 5, 2010