It's official!

It's official!
David Stubbs Photography

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Want to feel stupid? I have the answer!

There's really nothing else in life that will put you in place quicker than taking a really hard test, such as the SAT or the LSAT. You know that feeling--you go in thinking you're confident and smart, and you leave feeling like a dumb mouth drooler.

I've decided to pursue a Master's Degree in Journalism from Northwestern University. There are just a couple of obstacles in the way-one is the $40,000 I don't have, the other is taking the GRE test before I can get accepted.

Scan 15
I wish I would have studied more as a kid!
I had a moment of panic when I realized all of the math equations I didn't understand in the 8th grade are coming back to haunt me. Yep, even though I've never used any math problems in my adult life, and I'm 99% certain I never will, I still need to learn the value of (x-2)(x+3)-(x-4)(x+5). Dear God, help me now.

Think that's bad? How about his....
If 1 micron=10,000 angstroms, then 100 angstroms is what percent of 10 mincrons?

My answer=Who cares?

What also cracks me up is the vocabulary I'm studying. Some of the words I'd never use in everyday life...this I know for sure.

Auroral- Adj. Pertaining to the aurora borealis. (What?? Oh wait, they give an example. Hopefully this helps!) Example: "The auroral display was particularly spectacular that evening." (Picture me with my mouth wide open right now. It ain't pretty.)

Avuncular- Adj. Like an Uncle. (Huh? Like an Uncle? Is he or isn't he my damn uncle? Is Mike "Like my husband? Are you "Like Reading a Blog?")

Bedizen- V. Dress with vulgar finery. (Isn't that a contradiction?) Example: "The witch doctors were bedizened in their gaudiest costumes." (Yep, pretty sure I'll never need to use that line.)

Bugaboo- N. Bugbear; object of baseless terror. (What???) Example: "If we become frightened by such bugaboos, we are no wiser than the birds who fear scarecrows." (A wise man once told me the same thing...oh wait, he wasn't as much wise as drunk, it was in a bar and really what he said was,"If I controlled the alphabet, I'd put "U" and "I" closer together.")

Uh-oh, I'm taking this test in a month, and I'm bristling in fear. I'll be unmitigated until I take it. I hope that if I don't have the right answer, I'll at least have some witty repartee.

1 comment:

  1. Nice blog! I like your writing way. I'm doing practice GRE here: . I hope it's useful for GRE test takers.