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It's official!
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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Driving=Brain Surgery for some

Do you ever feel like you are the best driver in the world, and everyone else is just an idiot?  Seriously, if a person can't figure out a 4-way stop or a basic highway merge, how do they get through life?  How do people pass driving tests when logic is clearly not their native language?

On our long 6 hour drive from Canton, OH to Chicago this week, I realized there are at least three types of drivers that absolutely drive me nuts. (Trust me, there are more than 3, but I'll keep my complaining to a minimum...)

  1. The Left-Laner--This is the person who refuses to give up their position in the left lane, despite the fact they are driving slower than every other car on the interstate.  They will tie up traffic and piss people off, but they really don't care.  Even people on their tail swerving from side to side will not intimidate them, because let's face it, they never look in their rear view mirror.
  2. The Finger Lickin' Not-So Good Driver-- Ever played chicken with a driver for oh, say 30 miles or so??  You know what I'm talking about.  The driver gets on his cell phone and slows down to 10 under the speed limit, so you pass him.  Then a minute later, he's off the phone and cruises by you at Mach 10 speed.  Then a minute later, he's searching for something in the back seat, slows down, so you are passing him again.  Ugh, so annoying!  I'm tempted to make a sign saying "CRUISE CONTROL--USE IT!" that I always keep in my car, and flash to these Finger Lickin' drivers.
  3. The Tight Wheel Gripper--This is the driver who is leaning forward, and white-knuckling the steering wheel like nobody's business.  I always imagine this kind of driver quoting Kate Winslet in Titanic, saying "I'll never let go!"  This is almost always a woman, most often driving a large vehicle such as a minivan, and often has 4+ kids in the back.  Here's my question--you popped out 4 watermelon sized children out of a lemon size hole, and yet driving scares you???  Sheesh!  You should be able to do anything now!!

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