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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Dating in 2010

Dating in 2010 sucks.  True, I haven't been on a first date since January 4, 2004, but I'm there for all my friends who are trying to navigate the shark-infested waters of dating.  Today one of my girlfriends is heartbroken, trying to figure out why she and her boyfriend of a year broke up.  To me, I see she's the total package...beautiful, smart, funny, it's hard to understand why he ended it.

Nearly everyday I see my girlfriends crying because their guy won't call or suddenly seems disinterested.  I see my guy friends get their hearts broken when the girls they are interested in flirt with someone else at the bar.  I see couples who I thought were cute together, fall apart because one of them "isn't ready."

So here's Jeannie's dating advice for men and women....please have your credit cards ready.

* Crying a lot is just annoying.  At first, men may give you attention because they feel bad, but sooner or later you'll annoy them and all your girlfriends.  The only thing that should make you cry is a really good shoe sale.
 * Allow your man to live his own life.  Clinginess is like wearing socks with sandals.  Sure it's not illegal, but it doesn't make sense.
* Live your own life!  Doing your own thing like Yoga classes or going out with girlfriends is WAY more appealing than always being available.
* Don't always ask what he's thinking about.  (It's taking me years to learn this.)  Men really don't want to talk about their emotions.  If they're being quiet, bring up something they want to talk about like football/beer/brats/Megan Fox.

* The grass is not always greener.  Sure, it may be fun to date around and break hearts of women who aren't quite perfect enough for you.  Just remember...when you're balding and have a beer gut...playing the field will be much harder.
* Call already!  No, women don't want to wait a week to hear from you.  If you like her, call/text/tweet!
* Don't act like a jerk.  Despite many who will say otherwise, women don't like to be with douches.
* Don't be afraid to settle down.  Having a good woman to come home to is WAY more appealing than your former frat buddies who fart and scratch.

If you have any other questions, please don't hesitate to ask.


  1. Your right about the last comment except I taught my wife to fart. She still doesn't like it when I scratch. She doesn't understand the need to adjust the package.

  2. I almost cried when I read this. Because you are sweet and because it was humorous!