Finding someone to give the wedding toast: check!

The search is over, I've found someone to speak at our wedding and give a brilliant toast.  A man who will win the hearts of the audience and assure Mike and me that we did the right thing by taking the big leap.

I met this man at Jake Melnick's last night.  I went for drinks with two girlfriends, Whitney and Gene, who are in town from Indianapolis for Whitney's b-day.  The middle-aged man, obviously with a few drinks in his belly, had the liquid courage to approach us and buy us drinks. 

He asked how old Whitney is turning.  She said 26.  Here's his first inspirational speech...."Well, enjoys it!  Because (burp), before yous know it, you'll wakes up one daaayyyy and you'll be 45 with gray hairse."

Then he asked if any of us were married.  I said I was engaged.  Drum roll please...here are his next words of encouragement.  "Me and my buddies overs there, we're all married.  Mosts of us (burp) either wants a divorse, are divorshed, or want to kill our wives."

What do you think?  Won't that make a lovely toast?  See you in July!